Sequence

We've been trying dreams on for size over the past several months. In September we spent about a month living on a quiet gravel drive in Cape Cod post high season. My Hero was writing full time and workshopping a new piece. Sliding glass doors into a private yard gave the children a seamless indoor outdoor adventure as they could explore unfettered. A small lakefront beach for catching turtles and chasing minnows or kayakers was just through the woods and a proper front row seat at the Atlantic Ocean was only blocks away. At night we built fires and sang along with My Hero's violin. We absorbed an astonishing number of s'mores. We walked with wild turkeys. Our sweet neighbors brought fresh cut flowers and offered to share their firewood. This dream seemed to fit pretty well, but was un$u$tainable. We had to head home.

I got land fever. It took over two months before I began to be content in the city again. Meanwhile, the total searches at landandfarm.com was boosted by our constant viewing. Still, the idea of living aboard is intoxicating because of the implied simplicity, adventure, and romance. It's been surprisingly difficult to decide between seeds and sails until we discovered a livable solution: sequence. In our hearts, we aren't lifelong vagabonds. We're interested in experience and discovery, but we don't see ourselves sailing for more than a year or two at most. So, we decided to sail first and farm second.

Sticking to our tradition of doing something new on our anniversary, we spent our "Sweet 16" hauling the whole family to Mystic, CT and Portsmouth, RI to look at bluewater cruisers. They got to tour the world's first nuclear submarine and eat donuts as well. Not a bad day for a couple of dreamers.

Fair Winds

It's still early in the season here, but Providence gave My Hero gorgeous weather for his birthday (Happy Birthday!!!) and he finagled one of the only boats that was actually in the water moored just off Long Island Sound. I'm not going to lie. The cold bit through two sweaters and my coat. Wind must be cold blooded like a reptile, because it generally comes out after the sun has been up for a while. In our case, that was the last hour of our sailing time.

It was GLORIOUS!

We met a new friend (NF) who had at least 20 years of sailing experience. NF and My Hero generously coaxed me into taking the tiller while we had the precious wind. Normally, I stick to the sheets (ropes) and follow orders because I find the tiller counter-intuitive. Last season I logged a total of 40 minutes on a Sunfish before a lightening storm blew in. I was holding sleeping Mermaid the whole time. I'm not exactly a helmsman. So I was embarrassed to take the tiller in front of NF and didn't want to steal any of their wind time. This is not what is meant by "willing to learn."

I felt the wind working with our little vessel and the tiller started to make sense on a visceral level. I had to concentrate, but I made a successful tack. That was probably the longest I was ever at the tiller. My Hero fell in love with sailing first. I'm right behind him.

We didn't take any pictures, but it felt something like this:


Click here to learn about the Nortons, a family of 5 from the UK who are sailing around the world, expanding our dreams and spicing up our geography lessons. We all adore them!



I recently learned about this book promoting the value of sailing as a family in this day of decreased family leisure time and increased division due to digital devices. Here is the quote that sold me:

The best way to get people into sailing and keep them interested, says Hayes, is the time-honored relationship of a capable mentor and a keen apprentice: “Mentoring is teaching infused with leadership. Mentoring may center on a principal skill or a capability like sailing, but its mastery isn’t exclusive to the skill or the technique, but to the broader understanding of what makes the skill or technique valuable and relevant.”

Family, Mentoring, and Sailing - three loves of mine.

Fair Winds!

Reefing the Sail

This is a parenting technique I learned from sailing.


"Reefing is a sailing manoeuvre intended to reduce the area of a sail on a sailboat or sailing ship, which can improve the ship's stability and reduce the risk of capsizing, broaching, or damaging sails or boat hardware in a strong wind." -Wikipedia

For example, if four of your children simultaneous declare they need to use the one and only bathroom in your apartment, but the seven year old is the only one who says, "I need to go. I'm after Mom!" and your nearly-teenager starts having a stomp-shout fit about it because she was technically the first to say, "I need to go!," then you can reef the sail. In this, hypothetical case, you may smack said pre-teen with a long wooden kitchen spoon imported from Tunisia. Or you may take her precious face in your hands and fiercely whisper, "Don't do this." Or you may smile smugly to yourself at the cliche response of those under the influence of what we here like to call The Pubonic Plague and move on to helping another child find their socks, grateful you've already had your turn in the loo. This last would be an example of reefing the sail.

Fair Winds!

More of my favorite sailing eye-candy

The Oy! in Ahoy!

We had our first solo family sailing trip.  Yep! Everyone came.  All the kids including Mermaid. After a 3 hour drive to Tom's River, NJ (yeesh!) we finally got our boat and hit the water.  Torpedo hated the idea from the get go, Sparkle was inclined to be bored and Mermaid was just along for the ride.  The rest of us had at least done the classes previously.  

It was a new boat, new waters and 3 new sailors, so there was a bit of mayhem (and screaming from a very scared Torpedo).  We dropped one sail-tie in the water straight off, ran into one of the channel posts trying to recover it and then lost Angelfish's hat into the water.  It was a freebee from a conference, so we decided to let it sink to the bottom.  

After the initial turmoil, we regained our bearings, remembered some of what we had learned in our class and managed to make our way up and down the river without running into anyone/thing, not running aground and keeping all the O's in the boat.  BL (Bottom Line):  we ended successfully!

Post-sailing allowed time to throw rocks of various and sundry sizes into the water from the pier, a chance to use the bathroom and eat, then over to the ocean for an hour or two of watching the sun set behind us and watching the moon rise in front of us.  Truly glorious.  

Some bad traffic on the way home.  We arrived at 11:30pm (12 hours round-trip) but we did it! Gosh darn it.  And we're proud of it.

Outcome:  Sparkle changed her mind and decided sailing wasn't boring at all, but rather liked it.  Torpedo decided screaming his head off wasn't helping him or anyone else around him and settled into it gradually, and Mermaid managed to stay upright in the boat thanks to her "Bumbo" seat.  Star, Angelfish & Tangerine managed the sails beautifully and My Hero got some much needed skipper practice time.  (Tangerine even managed trimming the sails while nursing!  Amazing.)  We left with 2 adults, 5 kids and we returned with 2 adults, 5 kids.  Success!  Ahoy matey!